Okay, I’ll admit it – I’m the stereotypical writer in the sense that I am prone to holing myself up in the house for days on end when I get into a “zone.” For the past three days I have literally set up camp in my living room. The comfy new futon I acquired on one of my many trips to Vallejo has only facilitated this laziness. As the long weekend draws to a close, I find myself in a bit of a dilemma.

My living room usually looks like this:

This morning:

Yes, that is a BED you see in the middle of my living room. I have a Feng Shui nightmare on my hands…

Feng Shui, to make a long story short, is used to create and maintain the flow of positive energy in a space. In theory, even “things” hold and store energy, and can contribute to balance or imbalance in our lives. One of the crucial elements of Feng Shui is to eliminate clutter. Clutter causes energy to pool and stagnate, and you want energy to be able to circulate freely in your space. Something needs to be done about this living room situation, pronto.

I wish I could just get rid of the new futon (which obviously I don’t have room for), but the problem is – I love it. So the only other option is to rearrange the whole room.

I stared at the room for a good 20 minutes this morning, and I think I have an idea. It will be a radical change, but it’s Springtime — Change is Good. Stay tuned to see the finished product…

Well it appears I have chosen to work out all this excess baby energy in my life by adopting another cat, lol. Of course I didn’t realize that on a conscious level until a few days ago, but it makes sense. I was fostering this kitten, previously known as Magnifico, until a permanent home could be found. Turns out that permanent home will be with me and Cowboy McKitty. Just what I need right, another mouth to feed…
So I’d like to introduce everyone to the newest member of my family — Jake (aka Jakey or JJ) McPaw. He is a very sweet (and needy) 7 month old kitten. Cowboy loves having a little brother, and the two of them chase each other around all day and night. It’s super cute. The initial adjustment period was a bit rough (Jakey likes to sleep on my head for some reason), but we’re settling into a little routine and I love my boys!!! Jakey keeps Cowboy occupied so he has less time to attack me, 😉 and they both love to cuddle with Mama, which makes me very happy… I may not be ready for a baby yet, but I sure do love being a Mom. Let’s just hope I don’t turn into Angelina Jolie and become a chronic adopter. Aw hell, who am I kidding – I am so on my way to having 10 cats…

Well it appears I have chosen to work out all this excess baby energy in my life by adopting another cat, lol. Of course I didn’t realize that on a conscious level until a few days ago, but it makes sense. I was fostering this kitten, previously known as Magnifico, until a permanent home could be found. Turns out that permanent home will be with me and Cowboy McKitty. Just what I need right, another mouth to feed…
So I’d like to introduce everyone to the newest member of my family — Jake (aka Jakey or JJ) McPaw. He is a very sweet (and needy) 7 month old kitten. Cowboy loves having a little brother, and the two of them chase each other around all day and night. It’s super cute. The initial adjustment period was a bit rough (Jakey likes to sleep on my head for some reason), but we’re settling into a little routine and I love my boys!!! Jakey keeps Cowboy occupied so he has less time to attack me, 😉 and they both love to cuddle with Mama, which makes me very happy… I may not be ready for a baby yet, but I sure do love being a Mom. Let’s just hope I don’t turn into Angelina Jolie and become a chronic adopter. Aw hell, who am I kidding – I am so on my way to having 10 cats…

Well, my turn as pseudo-doula has been completed, and life is slowly returning to normal. Over the weekend I managed to get back into my writing zone, and have resumed work on my next novel When Love Isn’t Enough:

When desperation takes a tragic turn, a chain of events unfolds that changes the course of all three of their lives forever. It is a heartbreaking tale of true love, terrible timing, impossible choices, and how you find the strength to go on when you discover that, sometimes, love just isn’t enough…

WHEN LOVE, the prequel to SOUL MATES, is a story very close to my heart. The first six chapters are done, and diving back in, its hard not to be transported back to that place and time. It’s hard to re-create it without re-living it… Hell, I even have an urge to take another “research” trip down to LA to visit you-know-who. Whatever it takes to get those creative juices flowing, right? lol

Remember when I was writing about Goals the other day? Well my new goal is to finish this entire book by June 2006. That will keep me on track to self-publish in December 2006, and I can spend the summer promoting WHEN LOVE while I’m driving across the country… The entire book is outlined and mapped out, so I think this is in the realm of the possible. Besides, if I’m going to be a writer, I better get used to writing on a deadline, huh?

Wish me Luck!

Well, my turn as pseudo-doula has been completed, and life is slowly returning to normal. Over the weekend I managed to get back into my writing zone, and have resumed work on my next novel When Love Isn’t Enough:

When desperation takes a tragic turn, a chain of events unfolds that changes the course of all three of their lives forever. It is a heartbreaking tale of true love, terrible timing, impossible choices, and how you find the strength to go on when you discover that, sometimes, love just isn’t enough…

WHEN LOVE, the prequel to SOUL MATES, is a story very close to my heart. The first six chapters are done, and diving back in, its hard not to be transported back to that place and time. It’s hard to re-create it without re-living it… Hell, I even have an urge to take another “research” trip down to LA to visit you-know-who. Whatever it takes to get those creative juices flowing, right? lol

Remember when I was writing about Goals the other day? Well my new goal is to finish this entire book by June 2006. That will keep me on track to self-publish in December 2006, and I can spend the summer promoting WHEN LOVE while I’m driving across the country… The entire book is outlined and mapped out, so I think this is in the realm of the possible. Besides, if I’m going to be a writer, I better get used to writing on a deadline, huh?

Wish me Luck!

At 12:40 pm today, we welcomed Isabel Charlize Santillan into the world 🙂 6 perfect pounds and 1 perfect ounce. Dena was a trooper and the delivery went off without a hitch. Things got a little intense after the delivery with some complications, but the doctors did their thing and mama and baby are fine…

I’ve seen a lot of cool things in my life, but watching Isabel being born is definitely one of the coolest. Watching the birth of a child is to witness a miracle. I’m not going to lie — I almost fainted when the whole thing first got started… But once I recovered from that and got my bearings, I was sucked into this incredible journey that I feel so honored to have been a part of. I will never forget how it felt to be huddled around Dena expectantly, watching in awe at her strength and grace as she brought her child into this world… How crazy it was the first time we saw Isabel’s head (a FULL head of hair, might I add), and then even crazier after that final push when her tiny little body came spilling out, placed immediately on mama’s chest, mother seeing daughter for the first time… Hearing Isabel’s first cry fill the room was the most surreal, emotional, joyful, magical moment I’ve ever experienced. Isabel was looking around and totally alert from the moment she was placed on Dena’s chest, taking it all in, responding to the sound of her daddy’s voice as the doctors took care of the placenta problem…

Keeping Isabel company while Daddy tended to Mama’s recovery, I couldn’t help but marvel at how perfect this child is. Just hours into her life and I’m staring down at her realizing I am beholding the purest thing in the world — a newborn. Pre-socialization, sans memories, a soft, smushy bundle of uncorrupted lifeforce energy and sheer potential. Amazing. And you know what? There is nothing softer than a baby’s skin. Nothing.

Happy Birthday Isabel Charlize! Auntie Steph loves you!!!

At 12:40 pm today, we welcomed Isabel Charlize Santillan into the world 🙂 6 perfect pounds and 1 perfect ounce. Dena was a trooper and the delivery went off without a hitch. Things got a little intense after the delivery with some complications, but the doctors did their thing and mama and baby are fine…

I’ve seen a lot of cool things in my life, but watching Isabel being born is definitely one of the coolest. Watching the birth of a child is to witness a miracle. I’m not going to lie — I almost fainted when the whole thing first got started… But once I recovered from that and got my bearings, I was sucked into this incredible journey that I feel so honored to have been a part of. I will never forget how it felt to be huddled around Dena expectantly, watching in awe at her strength and grace as she brought her child into this world… How crazy it was the first time we saw Isabel’s head (a FULL head of hair, might I add), and then even crazier after that final push when her tiny little body came spilling out, placed immediately on mama’s chest, mother seeing daughter for the first time… Hearing Isabel’s first cry fill the room was the most surreal, emotional, joyful, magical moment I’ve ever experienced. Isabel was looking around and totally alert from the moment she was placed on Dena’s chest, taking it all in, responding to the sound of her daddy’s voice as the doctors took care of the placenta problem…

Keeping Isabel company while Daddy tended to Mama’s recovery, I couldn’t help but marvel at how perfect this child is. Just hours into her life and I’m staring down at her realizing I am beholding the purest thing in the world — a newborn. Pre-socialization, sans memories, a soft, smushy bundle of uncorrupted lifeforce energy and sheer potential. Amazing. And you know what? There is nothing softer than a baby’s skin. Nothing.

Happy Birthday Isabel Charlize! Auntie Steph loves you!!!

As someone coming off a week of sleep-deprivation, I am definitely experiencing firsthand the way a lack of sleep affects one’s mind and body. In my younger years, I could pull an all-nighter with the best of them, functioning quite effectively off 5 or 6 hours of sleep. But those days are behind me. I’m not a teenager anymore. I am not a pleasant person to be around when I don’t get my 8 hours, lol. Early to bed, early to rise is how I live my life, my sleep schedule so regular that I don’t even have an alarm clock in my bedroom. My body just gets up around 7-ish every morning, all by itself. Unless something happens to throw my schedule off.

It all started Monday when I brought the new kitty home. My new, 7 month old, nocturnal kitty who kept me up all night wanting to play. Not cool. I finally got to sleep around 3am, only to have the phone ring a short while later at 4:30am. It was Dena, alerting me that baby Isabel was finally going to grace us with her presence 🙂 So up to Vallejo I go… A long day in labor and delivery, but turns out it was another false alarm, so back to Santa Cruz… As soon as I return home, I head directly for bed, sleep the only thing on my mind. I got maybe 3 hours in before kitty is all up in my face (literally!) wanting to play. Seriously, this cat seems to like sitting on my HEAD. Have you ever tried to sleep with a cat sitting on your face? Anyways, to make a long story short, I haven’t gotten a good night’s sleep all week, and it is starting to wear on me mentally and physically. I feel the second cold of the season coming on, and as someone who doesn’t get sick often, I am beyond annoyed at my weakened immune system.

Faby told me about this article she read in TIME magazine about the effects of sleep deprivation. The author, Sora Song cites a 2003 sleep study’s results:

“The human brain is only capable of about 16 hours of wakefulness [a day] … When you get beyond that, it can’t function as efficiently, as accurately or as well.”

She goes on to say that:

“What most people don’t realize is that the purpose of sleep may be more to rest the mind than to rest the body.  Indeed, most of the benefits of eight hours’ sleep seem to accrue to the brain: sleep helps consolidate memory, improve judgment, promote learning and concentration, boost mood, speed reaction time and sharpen problem solving and accuracy.”

No shit.

Before I read that article, I was suffering through the sleep dep, continuing to stay up late working, trying to squeeze some productivity out of every waking hour. It’s no wonder I find myself staring at a blank page for hours at a time, not producing anything but a steady stream of frustration. What I should do is just Go To Bed.

And on that note…

Ever catch yourself walking by a mirror and gasp, wondering “Where the hell did THAT come from???” lol Well, my habit during winter is to hunker down and hibernate, so I accept the fact that over the holidays I’m going to gain a little ‘winter weight.’ Now that the temperatures are starting to warm and the skies are beginning to clear, I’m realizing it’s time for me to get off my ass and get moving again. Cardio. Yoga. There is no time like the present. It will be swimsuit season before we know it and I may be in the Islands as early as April.

So it’s time to start riding again. Spent all day yesterday cruising around town on my bike. The Groundhog may have signaled six more weeks of winter, but it was gorgeous and sunny in Santa Cruz…

My ride started up at UCSC, looking down at my lovely, little ocean town.

Then I rode down into town and North on Highway One towards Wilder Ranch…

Then back into town, cruising along West Cliff…

Even stopped at Steamer’s to watch the surfers for awhile… There was some kind of surfing competition going on…

It was a great day and being out in the sunshine really energized me. I think its time to shake off winter and start thinking about the ways we can prepare for the coming of Spring. It’s the start of a whole new cycle of birth and renewal!

Well, its been over a year now that I’ve been doing this writing thing (seriously), and I’m starting to notice some of my cycles/patterns. Like the writing/editing/reading pattern. After I meet a writing deadline, I switch hats and go into editing mode, which involves looking at the manuscript in a completely different way. When writing, the focus is on expansion, and when editing, the mentality is slice, cut, shave… I’ve discovered that after I finish a major edit/revision, I need a break from writing altogether. I find myself spending my “work” time reading, which I suppose is still technically work if you think about it as studying your contemporaries and researching your competition. 😉

I’ve resumed reading NEVA HAFTA, which I had to abandon halfway through about a month ago to read about HypnoBirthing. Anyways, it’s funny how one can’t fully ‘shift gears’ overnight. Here I am soaking in the bathtub, trying to enjoy my book, when I hit a paragraph that makes me want to reach for my red pen, lol. My mind is still in editing mode, and I just want to axe every stray “that” and rearrange complete sentences… And it’s not even my book! LOL! Will I ever be able to read like a normal person again???

(Not to say that Edwardo’s book is riddled with bad grammar, which it’s not. His writing is very strong. I’m just stuck in editing mode.)

Anyways, critical twitching aside, its nice to be a consumer again. I believe reading makes people better writers, and I try to devote as much time to reading as I do other parts of my career. When my mind if sufficiently decompressed from the stress of overwork to meet a deadline, I will pick up the pencil again and get to it. Full circle…